My parents were devotees of Shirdi Sai Baba. In those days 'Sai' was already a name often used by
us in our little family, which lived in a village called Kikkeri of Mandya District of Karnataka.
I lost my parents when I was very young and I became an unsettled orphan in that parentless family.
I left home and for the next five to six years I was wandering from place to place visiting many a
holy pilgrimage centers, often in the company of some wandering monks. On such a journey during the
year 1953, I had also been to Puttaparthi and visited the young Sai Baba. In those days, a metallic
archboard bearing the words in Telugu 'Bhagavan Sri Sathya Sai Baba Prasanthi Nilayam' was there on
the main gate of Puttaparthi.
The word 'Bhagavan' attracted my curiosity of the reality of Baba and I wanted to taste the powers
of Baba and stayed there for a few days. I was not much impressed first in any way about Baba, as I
was in the company of other sadhus who were familiar with some tantric trics. My companionship with
sadhus, instead of giving me Spiritual knowledge, resulted in my addiction to narcotics and allied activities.
I was now about twenty years old and I was growing up with a distinct personality. I had the
opportunity of visiting Rishikesh where I met a divine master named Swami Shradhananda. I was
blessed to be his servant for some time. The Swami told me about Bhagavan Sri Sathya Sai Baba and
His divine qualities.
Once Bhagavan Baba had visited the Ashram of Swami Sivananda of Rishikesh and many sadhus in that
area had the darshan of Bhagavan Baba. Swami Shradhananda did not go to Him. The Swami told me that
Bhagavan Baba can come to us whenever and wherever we yearn for His darshan—Swami Shradhananda was
known for his higher attainment of yogic practices. One day Swami Shradhananda narrated to me about
his experience of Bhagavan Baba's visit to His dwellings, when at the same time Baba was in
Rishikesh in Swami Sivananda's Ashram, Swami Shradhananda had particulary told me that my peaceful
future would be by the blessings of Bhagavan Sri Sathya Sai Baba.
After the samadhi of Swami Shradhananda in Mount Abu, I returned to South India. My mind was wooing
to be near Bhagavan Baba's divine feet. I went to Puttaparthi. Baba did not speak to me. He was so
different and unlike many other Swami's who generally impress those who came to them. I was very
much disappointed and became upset in life without a clear direction. My experience with Sadhus who
often choose to live by begging made me feel ashamed. My daily needs forced me to steal valuable
things. I also used to be a clever liar to collect money. I was lead to the pleasures of alcoholic sensations.
Once again I was in Bangalore when I learnt that Baba was in Whitefield. I rushed for His darshan.
Just then Baba was leaving in His car to a devotees house for lunch and I followed Him by foot to
that place. When Baba saw me standing outside the compound wall, He asked me to have food in that
house. When He returned to Whitefield I followed Him immediately. This time Baba spoke to me length
and advise me to join some place to work without wandering aimlessly.
I followed Baba's advise and I was given a job: physical labor at Pandavapura Sugar Factory. I
yearned to be at Puttaparthi. I was a regular participant at Sri Ramachandra Shetty's Bhajan Center
in Mysore. Baba had blessed his house by His divine presence many times. The song 'O, Bhagavan. O,
Bhagavan' was my song of the soul and I cried with it to Baba about my misfortune. During that
period, I was thrown out of my temporary job. I rushed by walk to Puttaparthi to have Baba's
darshan. I was stopped by Baba himself at Penukonda Railway Level Crossing. He was driving down to
Bangalore and asked me, "Where are you up to?" I told Him that I was going to have His darshan at
Puttaparthi. I told Him my problem and He told me, "You are already having your darshan. And now
return to your work! You will be given a permanent job." He also gave me 20 rupees for my needs. My
joy knew no bounds! I spent every paise of it then and there and I returned to Pandavapura. Baba's
words were true. I was again given a job in the same factory where I was working earlier.
Though I got a job it was really difficult to manage my earnings of only 2 rupees per day; my bad
habits were many and my daily needs had to be met. Once during a Shivaratri Festival I was at
Puttaparthi and had stolen some clothing belonging to devotees and on my return to my place I
exhibited them as a gift given to me by Baba!
The journey to Puttaparthi was not so expensive. A trip up and down to Puttaparthi was just costing
6 rupees. However, I was not fortunate enough to have even that amount at times. Once I was at
Puttaparthi and I extended my stay beyond my limits of expenses. I had stolen a suitcase belonging
to a devotee and secured it on the top of the hillock of Vata Vriksha beside the big boulders,
overlooking Prasanthi Nilayam.
Baba had consoled the victim and assured him he would he would get his suitcase back soon. I was
standing along with other devotees to get Baba's darshan, when Sri Kasturi came to me and directed
me to see Baba in His room. There, Baba admonished me for my bad behavior and asked me to return
the suitcase immediately. I pleaded with Him for pardon and told Him that I would not be doing such
a nasty thing if only Baba had blessed me to have a decent life. I also pleaded my fear of police
and publicity and sought His protection. Baba blessed me with His protection and told me that, "No
big police officer, whatever be his rank, can ever touch you as long as you have me for protection!"
Then He sent Mr. Kasturi to collect the suitcase instead of me. He never disclosed this incident to
anyone else. He gave me vibhutti but no money this time. Sri Kasturi after hearing everything about
me and my devotion to Baba told me that in a way I was really blessed by Baba and paid for my
return ticket to Pandavapura.
The job in hand was satisfactory. The wages were very meager. My bad habits were many. I also
desired to have Baba's darshan often. I got into marriage on the advice of my well-wishers. But my
grief was doubled in every respect especially as my journey to Parthi now became impossible.
On 1963 Gurupoornima day, I was in Puttaparthi. There we learnt that Baba was suffering from a
stroke of paralysis. Sri Kasturi explained to us that Baba suffering were a result of His 'taking
over' the pains of a devotee. It was already a week. On the day before Gurupoornima, Baba was
brought out for public darshan, being carried on a chair held by a number of devotees. Baba was
seen by us in a completely helpless situation as His left hand and leg were in a stiffened
condition. All of us were thinking "Is this the situation for God, even?"
Just then Baba was asking for a cup of water to drink. It was given to Him immediately. Baba had a
few sips of water and seeing Him I felt bad and I broke into tears. I was crying as if Baba had
left His body, ending His avataric mission! But Baba was soon standing in front of us, speaking to
us with His sweet melodious voice.
This incident made a forceful impact on me. During the speech He explained to us (among many
things), His leela of taking over diseases belonging to His devotees as part of His mission.
He also told us about His three divine Avatars; one was at Shirdi, the second which is now
at Puttaparthi, and te third which would descend as Prema Sai at some place in Mandya District of
Karnataka on the banks of Cauvery river.
At the same time I was telling myself if Bhagavan Baba was God really and on that next day if only
Baba blessed me permitting me a padnamaskar at His feet untouched by anybody else, I would
become a completely changed person devoting the rest of my life to service and would lead a life
comfortably remembering His name and settling down on the banks of the river Cauvery at Sri Rangapatnam.
On the next day, Baba blessed this poor soul and his desire, and I am whatever I am today. His
shower of blessing washed every cell in this body and gave me everything I dreamt of as an aimless
wandering man.
Besides blessing me with the shower of Vibhutti and flow of Amrith, He changed me
totally to be an unseful instrument in rendering some small help in giving shelter for many
orphaned children who live with our own children in our house [Sri Halgappa is the owner of the
famous Sri Rangapatnam Orphanage in Mysore]. My house is now full of such sweet names of our Lord,
when I call my children Sai Prasad, Sai Prema, Sai Kumar, Sai Ganesh, Sai Shankar, Chitravathi,
Prasanthi, etc., and I feel blessed to be constantly remembering Bhagavan Baba and His greatest
leela of reforming me and securing me strongly in His Divine embrace.
